Life and Work by Design Blog

1.  Your headstone will not say “he/she just lived and ordinary life.

2.  Your Mother will be proud even if she’s not still around to tell you.

3.  You will have a sense of accomplishment.

4.  You can set a new standard for your kids.

5.  You can help someone else have a better life.

6.  You might win some kind of award or recognition.

7.  You will learn new things about yourself and others.

8.  You will want to get out of bed in the morning.  

9.  You will have something to write in your journal.

 10. Life will be fun again…..   

Some friends and I went to see The Secret Life of Bees last week.  It’s a wonderful story about a time and a culture that many of us know very little about - the rural South in the early 1960’s era of civil rights reform and the industry of bee-keeping and honey production.

While listening to the bees fan themselves inside the hives one hot summer day, August the beekeeper tells Lily, “most people don’t have any idea about all the complicated life going on inside a hive.  Bees have a secret life we don’t know anything about.”

You can see the metaphor coming, I’m sure.  Don’t we all live secret lives in our minds sometimes?  Some of them are fanciful - I still wish I could be a ballerina - and some of them are impractical - a 72 yr old friend of mine wants to be an astronaut.

But in many cases, the only reason we harbor secret lives is because we don’t believe we can do it or we don’t know how to start.

What’s your secret life?  Is it  being a talk show host, a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist, a park ranger, or a shoe designer?  Or do you want to figure out a way to help a group like battered women, orphaned children, homeless veterans or struggling teens?

What’s the thing you most want to do or who do you most want to be?   I know you can do it if you decide to.  It may take a long time and it might be scary to think about, but wouldn’t it be worth it if you could live your secret life?

Let’s find your passion together.  I’m offering a special discount on my Dreamer’s Dialogue consulting sessions - a $40 savings if you sign up NOW for a January appointment.

You can go to the website and read about it on the Services page. Link     Evening and weekend time slots are available.

Then go to the Contact page and send me an e-mail before December 31st.

Tell me your phone number and the best times to contact you so we can arrange your session.                           START THE NEW YEAR OFF RIGHT!

I had a panic attack of sorts yesterday.   You know the feeling – all of a sudden, out of the blue, those internal thoughts start pitching a tantrum that can make even the best of us throw in the towel.

I had decided to spend this whole week planning my marketing for the next 6 months complete with newsletter topics, blog ideas, and tele-class subjects.  A big bite for sure.

I know that the best way to get the ideas flowing is to “crawl into my cave” by keeping the e-mail closed and the phones turned off for several hours at a time so I can immerse myself in tasks like this.

And then it happened……I stopped for lunch when all of a sudden this monster from nowhere jumped in and said, “Who do you think you are?   What makes you such an expert?  There’s no way you can increase your business that much in one year!”     Wow – instant paralysis!

For the next 30 minutes or so, I truly wrestled with my mind going back and forth with thoughts like “taking a job would be so much easier” and  “no way, I’ve got too much invested in this business to quit now.”

How did I stop this argument?  I went back to my original mission statement to remind myself what this is all about.

I coach men and women over 50 who want to create a bigger, better life for their second act that fulfills a dream, rewards their soul or pays something back to their community. 

You see, I am a believer, an optimist (even now) and I just HAVE to work at helping others – it’s in my DNA.

So I rang the gong on that wrestling match, went for a walk in the snow, and then got back to work.     It happens to all of us every once in a while.  So don’t give in when it happens to you.   Go back to the great idea you started with, gather your confidence and start in again.    If I can do it, you can too!

Do you have a story of the “no” monsters plaguing you?   Share it in a comment here ….

Ah, did I get your attention?  The problem with blogs is that things get lost way back in the archives - I doubt too many readers actually go back and read them all.  So, I’m bringing an important one back to the front.

Civic Ventures.org is the creation of Marc Freedman, the author of Encore Careers: Finding Work That Matters in the Second Half of Life.  For the last several years, Freedman and his group have been promoting the concept of Boomers using their collective experience and wisdom to benefit our society by creating new, possibly unique solutions to many of our ills.

They have created an organization that recognizes the efforts of thousands of folks who have found a cause and applied their passion to it.  If getting involved with the less fortunate, giving back to your local community or finding a better way to provide public services is one of your dreams, you need to get on this bandwagon.

Freedman’s book is inspiring and the website is full of fascinating stories and resources for Boomers who are ready to go back to work to improve the lives of others.    Check it out at www.civicventures.org and read about the Purpose Prizes for 2008 that were just announced.  Six hard-working folks received $100,000 and nine others were awarded $10,000.  They are all over 60 and from towns across the country.  Here’s a link to the press release:

http://www.civicventures.org/news/releases/index.cfm?date=2008_12_03